Changing Direction

All the boys were sick with colds last week and after a week of laying on the couch watching movies all day all of us were feeling pretty unmotivated about rejoining life in the real world.  Monday morning I got Noah up and ready for school but the two little boys were still in pajamas with sleep encrusted eyes when we got in the car.   I felt pathetic and finally that motivation to get going showed up.  I washed their faces, brushed their teeth, served cinnamon toast and scrambled eggs, got them dressed, got myself more put together and decided we should walk Toby to preschool.

Toby didn't like the idea of going back to preschool.  "I want to watch more Diego," he whined.  Clearly, his motivation hadn't shown up.  But I zipped up his jacket and loaded Miles into the stroller.  "Sorry, it's preschool day.  You'll get to do other fun things, like paint and play on the slide!"

The first block of our walk brought more whining.  "I don't like school!  It's yucky."  I ignored this.  "It's too rough.  School is too rough for me."  I chuckled at this.  "I want to go home. With you!"  I paused at this.  And then I knew that if anything was going to motivate Toby it had to be...me.

We kept walking and I quietly said, "You know what I like about school?  I like play-dough."  Toby looked at me but didn't say anything.  "You know what else I like?  I like the train set."  Toby smiled, "Me, too!"
I continued chattering about things I liked about preschool and Toby continued agreeing with me.  By the time we reached the school Toby was eager to join his class and do all things that we liked.

So many times a day I feel like I'm failing.  The laundry is piling up.  The floors are covered in cheerios and spilled juice, dinner isn't ready, I'm behind on projects, the baby is crying, a million chores are left half done because I was distracted by something else... I just can't seem to get on top of it all.  Geary is so helpful and I know a lot of my struggle is trying to reach this impossible standard of Perfect Mother that I've set for myself.  I cried about it to my women's prayer group at church yesterday and the mothers of multiple kids all completely understood.

Today is another preschool day and Toby can't wait to go there.  I can't help but think that our focusing on the positives (the blessings) about school has something to do with that.  And I think it's a lesson I need to work on for myself, too.

You know what I like about being a stay at home mom?  I like the play-dough :)